


Growing into Buck and Eddie

by buckleydiaz



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 1-6 pre 2x18, 2x18 buddified, Boyfriends, Engagement, First Kiss, Fluff, Light Smut, M/M, PTSD, Phantom pain, amputee buck, buddie, caring boyfriend, eddie diaz - Freeform, evan buckley - Freeform, post 2x18 ch 7, shannon is alive but just mentioned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-06-02 07:06:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 7,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19436410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buckleydiaz/pseuds/buckleydiaz
Summary: Chapter 1 of "Growing into Buck and Eddie" story. This part takes place before the accident in 2x18. Buck offers Eddie rides home from work and it leads to them getting much closer.





	1. Just One Beer

**Author's Note:**

> First Buddie Fic I've written.

When Eddie's truck broke down Buck so generously offered to give Eddie rides to work and home from work. Today was a long day, after both of them working an 18 hour shift they both needed some unwinding time. 

Buck pulls into Eddie's driveway when Eddie asks, "want to come in for a beer." Obviously Buck wouldn't say no when his crush asks to have a beer together.

"Yeah, but just one beer." 

When they enter the house they say goodbye to Carla and Eddie checks on sleeping Christopher. Buck pulls two bottles out of the fridge and sits on the couch waiting for Eddie to return. Eddie groans as he jumps on the couch with Buck and takes a sip of beer. 

"Everything okay?" Buck asks him.

"Yeah, I just hate working these long shifts and not being able to spend anytime with him. And when I'm not working he has school. And he loves school."

"Was it worth talking to Shannon to get him into that school?

"Yeah, he loves it and now I'm divorced and ready to move on."

Buck can't help to wonder if Eddie could ever move on to him. "Moving on so soon."

"I haven't been with anyone in almost a year"

"A year? You haven't had sex in almost a year." Buck is so shocked. How could someone as attractive as Eddie not have anyone to have sex with. 

"It's not like I've never had the option, it's just, I don't know, I'm always thinking of Christopher. What if I fall in love or get a girl pregnant. I just don't want to confuse him." Eddie explains

It's been a few weeks since Buck has been with someone. It's been hard for him to find love since his infatuation with Eddie began. "Do you miss it?" Buck asked making Eddie confused. "I mean, do you miss not being a father, not being married, and able to put yourself out there," he continued.

"Christopher is the best thing that ever happened to me. But I think I made the wrong decision when I got married. We got married for Christopher not for us. I love being married, I love knowing I have someone to go home to."

"Then maybe you should put yourself back out there." At this point in the night they are both almost done with their beers and sitting very closely together. Neither of them are talking they're just staring at each other with heart eyes.

Eddie impulsively slams his lips down on Bucks and Buck doesn't hesitate to kiss back. A few seconds in Eddie pulls back and looks super embarrassed. "Oh- oh shit I'm sorry I don't know why I did that. Oh my-"

"Shut up" Buck interrupts him and kisses him again. This time they both completely into it. When Buck pulls away again he says, "I should really go now."

"You don't have to"

"Yeah I know, but I should." They both stand up and they kiss again even more heated than before. "I'll see you tomorrow" Buck finally says before walking out the door leaving Eddie alone again.


	2. Just an average day at the Fire House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Buck and Eddie's makeout session they need to keep in on the DL with their coworkers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me posting chapter two even though no one has read chapter one yet !

Eddie texted Buck that his truck was out of the shop and he no longer needed a ride. Buck was a little disappointed because he wanted to discuss the kiss they had last night before work. Neither of them had any idea what to say to each other and their co workers. When Eddie arrived at work after dropping Christopher off at school, he saw Buck was in the locker room and everyone else is upstairs. Eddie walks into the locker room.

"Hey" Eddie says starting the conversation.

"Hey. Um can we keep everything that happened last night on the down low? I just don't want it to be a big deal."

"Yeah of course, I just had a great time."

"Me too, but I'm not ready for it." Buck is afraid of what everyone else may think of him being open to relationships with other men. 

"Okay, whatever you want." Eddie stated while changing his shirt. Buck stared as he changed and Eddie couldn't help himself but to smirk at him. Buck walks upstairs to have breakfast with everyone else. 

"Want some eggs?" Bobby asks.

"No I'm good." Buck replies while pouring himself a cup of coffee."

"Damn, what's up your ass this morning?" Hen says as Eddie walks up the stairs behind him. "Nevermind." She answers her own question while looking at Eddie. Buck and Eddie exchange nervous gay panic looks before the alarm goes off. They all rush into the truck, however, Buck can't get Eddie out of his head.   
\---  
They arrive at an apartment fire and as usual Buck and Eddie pair up. Ever since Eddie joined the station Captain just put them together. They worked so well together. They have to take the stairs up to the fourth level to begin rescuing civilians.

"This building has so many fire hazards." Eddie stated as Buck trailed behind him.

"Have you ever been with a guy before?" Leave it to Buck to ask impulsive questions.

"What?"

"You heard me. Have you been with a guy before?"

"A few times. When I was in the army. What about you?" Eddie used to screw around with the other soldiers even when he was married. 

"More than a few times. But mostly one night stands." They move on from the topic when they hear screaming coming from one of the apartments. When they burst in they see two young adult females. One girl with red hair has her chest pinned under a fallen night stand with a brunette girl sitting next to her crying. 

"I was afraid to move it?" The brunette stated

"You did the right thing," Eddie said as he examined her. "BP's high and breathing is shallow. We need to get this off of her"

"On it." Buck begins to lift it off of her and Eddie begins to put pressure on the bleeding.

"Let's evacuate." They begin to put her on a backboard. 

"Is she gonna be okay?" The brunette asks the hot firemen standing next to her.

"She's gonna be just fine, but we need to get you both out of here now." Buck answers her question. They begin heading down the unstable stairs quickly. 

When they exit the building they immediately get an oxygen mask on her and she regains conciseness. She takes the mask off and looks around at the firemen.

"You should really keep that-" Eddie begins before being interupted.

"Holy shit you're hot."

"I know, which one do you want and which one can I have?" Her brunette friend asks.

"Flattered but we need to get you to the hospital, and why doesn't your friend join you?'' Buck says as they load her into the ambulance with Chimney. 

The ambulance drives away and Buck and Eddie are left standing alone.

"So which one was more your type?" Eddie asks

"I think we both know neither of them were my type." Buck says and then walks away.


	3. Is this ever going to happen?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck shows up at Eddie's house hoping to get some answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woooo! I'm actually updating. Some time this week I'll make a Buddie tumblr. Light smut in this one, not graphic and I skip to the end of it at a point.

It was late enough for Buck to know that Christopher would be asleep but early enough he knows Eddie will still be awake. Buck didn't even know exactly what he was doing. He should've called or at least texted Eddie to make sure it's okay if he comes over, but now it's too late. He's standing on Eddie's porch about to ring the doorbell and then realizes to just knock and not wake Christopher up. Eddie opens the door right away before Buck can even process what he's doing. Eddie obviously wasn't expecting any visitors, he's wearing a white t shirt and his briefs.

"Hey. What's going on?" Eddie asks

"Um I don't know" Buck says stutterly.

"Buck, what are you doing here?"

"Is this ever gonna happen?" He uses finger motions between him and Eddie.

"You're the one who asked me not to make a deal about it at the fire station."

"Yeah, but are we ever gonna happen?" 

"You tell me, I'm all in I just need to know if you are too."

Without hesitation Buck slams his lips on Eddie's and Eddie pulls him inside. Once Eddie closed the front door behind him he slams Buck against the wall making a loud noise. 

"Shit, Christopher's asleep. We need to be quiet."

"Bedroom?" Buck asks and Eddie nods slowly dragging him to the other room. When they enter the room Eddie pushes Buck down on the bed and starts to fumble with his shirt before Buck stops him.

"Do you top... or bottom?" Buck asks awkwardly.

"Hm, both I guess."

"Me too, do you want to-?"

"What do you want to"

Buck is normally a bottom and likes it more but he doesn't want to admit it right away. "I can bottom, does that work?"

"Okay, yeah" Eddie says and start removing his own shirt. Buck begins to undress himself until they are both only in their briefs. Eddie is naturally taking control and Buck can't complain he's been thinking about this for a long time. As Eddie kisses down his abs Buck is a weak moaning mess. Eddie removes the other mans briefs and begins stroking his member.   
\----  
The night ends with Eddie collapsing beside Buck both of them panting. Buck is laying on his stomach and Eddie is on his back beside him. 

"I should go." Buck says beginning to stand up.

"No, stay the night." 

"Are you sure, I don't want Christopher to see me."

"He won't. Just wait until I take him to school to leave."

Buck smirks and jumps right back in bed with Eddie, curling up against him. Buck came to Eddie's house not knowing if anything would happen but he was pretty damn happy with how it ended.


	4. It Doesn't have to be a secret anymore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When one of the other firefighters finds out Buck and Eddie's secret they decide it is time to stop hiding.

Buck and Eddie have been going steady with each other for over two weeks. They have never been on a real date however they've had some stay home dates after Christopher fell asleep. About three days into their little romance they both agreed to be exclusive and also keep it a huge secret. The station has some suspicions but nobody had said anything yet. 

Today was a Monday, Monday mornings the team always did a morning workout before shift. When Eddie arrived Buck was already on the bench press lifting weights. Eddie was immediately turned on by his hot and sweaty boyfriend. He did a pretty good job hiding it because they were through half of the workout and nobody has noticed what's growing in his pants. Not even Buck. 

As soon as Buck did notice him and Eddie made eye contact and they smirked at eachother. 

"I got to take a leak" Eddie said as he walks to the first floor men's bathroom. 

"I'm gonna wash this chalk off my hands." Buck moves his hands so that the team can see his hands are covered in chalk and he isn't just following his boyfriend. Chimney and the rest of the team remained in the gym. Buck follows Eddie into the bathroom and without even bothering to lock the door or go into a stall Buck is on his knees ready to assist his boyfriend.

"Can you go quick?" Eddie asks as Buck nods and begins to do what he is best at. Probably not even a minute in Chimney walks in, looking to wash the chalk of his hands. Buck and Eddie's face quickly turns red as Buck stands up and Eddie pulls his pants up.

"I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that" Chimney says as he turns around and closes the door behind him. 

"Wait Chim-" Buck begins but the door slams before he could ask him to keep it a secret. Eddie and Buck exchange looks before quickly getting cleaned up.

"Hey Chim, you didn't get the chalk of your hands?" Bobby asks him when he noticed Chim rushed out.

"Oh, yeah. There's no soap in there I'm gonna go upstairs." Buck walks out of the bathroom and begin to do some crunches on the gym floor. About half a minute later Eddie follows and continues his workout. Bobby and Hen don't think much of it until Eddie walks right in front of them and sees two hand prints in chalk right on his ass. Him and Buck haven't seem to notice but everyone around them seemed to figure out their secret. 

"Hey Eddie did you sit in the bucket of chalk?" Bobby asks

"What" Eddie turns to look in the mirror and panics when he sees Buck's handprints on his ass. "I'll be right back."

"Wait-" Hen begins, "You don't have to be a secret anymore, we all know you and Buck are involved with eachother. Nobody cares." Buck and Eddie look at eachother in some sort of relief. They turn their heads to the Captain.

"Just no more doing it at work." He says and exits the gym with everyone else to start the shift. Leaving the two boyfriends alone in a room together.

"I guess it doesn't have to be a secret anymore, huh?" Eddie says to Buck. Buck gets up to kiss him before they go into the locker room and change. It took the pressure off of the two of them when everyone found out and they don't have to figure out what to tell people.


	5. I can trust you right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shannon is relinquishing all her parental rights. Who's going to fill the emergency contact for Christopher?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been updatting like crazy and I know the only readers are my friends that I force to read this.

Buck has been having sleepovers with Eddie a few nights a week. They've been telling Christopher that it's just a slumber party, even though they sleep in the same bed. Eddie hasn't figured out how to explain to Christopher what is going on between him and Buck. However, Christopher loves having Buck around and Buck loves being around.

Eddie's alarm goes off at 5:45 am. 

"Why so early?" Buck groans as he lays on Eddie's chest.

"I have to get Christopher ready." Eddie begins to get out of bed leaving Buck pillow less. "Go back to sleep, I'll be back at 7:15 to make you breakfast." Eddie smirks and walks out of the room and Buck tries to fall asleep.

\--

It's around 7:15 and Buck hears the front door open so he stands at the end of the hall as his attractive boyfriend walks in. "Hey handsome" Buck says to him.

Eddie is carrying the mail and walks up to kiss his boyfriend. "You hungry?"

"Yeah for you," Buck follows him into the kitchen.

"We have to go to work soon. We don't have time." Eddie says as he shuffles through the mail, he stops at an huge orange envelope.

"What's that." Buck asks.

"Um. I don't know, divorce papers?"

"So soon. I wasn't expecting it."

"Haha. Probably from Shannon." Eddie is confused because he already received divorce papers in an envelope like this.

"I thought that was already done." 

"It was, this must be a copy or something." Eddie opens the envelope and reads it. "Oh."

"oh what?" Buck asks.

"She relinquishing all her parental rights, like all of them. She doesn't want to be involved with his school or medical emergencies."

"um, and?"

"I mean I knew she didn't want to be involved but this is so serious. Like she cannot change her mind and come back in his life."

"What will you tell him?"

"She's moving away, allergic to responsibility, dead?"

"Eddie, babe, you can't tell him she died."

"Why, how would he ever find out."

"He's gonna have questions, you just wanna live in a lie?" Buck asks concerning.

"Well I'm already lying to him, about us, and about Shannon."

"Then tell him"

"I'm not gonna tell him that his mother never wants to see him again."

"Tell him about us."

"I can't-"

"Do you think he's gonna care?"

"I don't know what he will think" Eddie says as he continues to flip through the papers. "Shit."

"What?"

"i need to change all the information for the school, like contact info." Eddie takes a long pause. "I can trust you right."

"Whatever you need."

"Can I put you down as the new emergency contact for him?"

"Really? He doesn't even know we're dating."

"I'm gonna tell him eventually. He's not stupid he can figure it out."

"Honestly, I think he already has." 

"yeah, so I can put you down for him and me?"

Buck has a puzzled look when Eddie asks for himself. "You don't have one?" 

"Well it was Shannon and I never changed it, and right now you're the only one I trust."

Buck nods and smiles at him accepting the responsibility.

"So are you gonna ask me to be yours?"

"Maddie's mine, but when she asks Chimney to be hers, then you can be mine."

"Um isn't Chimney already hers, he was talking about it a few weeks ago."

"Wait what, then she's fired from this role it's you all the way."

Eddie smiles and kisses Buck.


	6. I love you but now I need to run into a burning house.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck is a bad listener, in fact, he hardly listens to what Cap has to say. But not following Caps orders could cost a life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler alert, first I love you in this chapter. Also I'm gonna update a few chapters tonight so read them all please!

It was just a normal day at the station with the crew doing hose maintenance. They've had a few calls but nothing too interesting. 

"Attention 118, Attention 118. Please report to 364 Willshire RD. Family house fire." Dispatch announces and the crew automatically go to their assigned positions and head to that home. When they arrive the house has already been thrown up in flames. They jump out of the truck and begin to get the hoses out.

"Is anyone still inside?" Captain Nash asks the family of 3 standing outside.

"I-I don't know, my 16 year old daughter comes an goes. I'm not sure if she was home." The father announces.

"If she's home, we'll find her. Diaz! Go inside and make a quick sweep of the house. Quick, you got about 7 minutes before this house goes down!"

"Got it Cap!" Eddie says as he puts on the mask. Buck walks up next to him as he is preparing to go inside.

"Hey, be careful." Buck whispers to him.

"I'll be fine, I love you." Eddie says and then runs away into the burning house. That was the first time he said I love you and Buck never got the chance to say it back. He just stands there in shock for a moment. Buck does love Eddie, he's just never said anything. 

"Buck!" Cap shouts and Buck doesn't move. "Buck!" Buck finally looks over to Cap. "Get the hoses ready, the second Diaz gets out we're hosing this down." Buck follows his command and has the hoses ready. 

"Hello?" The father says as he answers his phone. "Oh my god, you're okay." He says then he turns to Cap, "she isn't home."

Cap nods as he radios to Eddie, "Diaz, house is empty, evacuate now!"

"Hold on Cap. I see something." Eddie radios out.

"Eddie, the house is empty, evacuate!"

"Okay! I'm coming out." Eddie says and the team sighs in relief, until they see a huge flame go up and Buck's instinct was to panic.

"Eddie!" Buck screams at the burning house before running over to the truck to grab some gear. "I'm going in there, and I can help Eddie!" He doesn't even bother with the mask and the tank. He just throws on his jacket and runs towards the house.

"Buck!" Captain screams, "It's too dangerous, we'll hose down the house then we rescue Eddie."

"No I'm going in there." Buck runs into the house while Cap screams his name behind him. Cap rolls his eyes knowing that Buck would've done it anyway. 

When Buck is in the house, he sees everything is in flames and turning into ash. He looks around for Eddie but he is clueless on Eddie's location and he doesn't have a lot of time or breathable air left. Buck is on the first floor of the house and the ceiling is beginning to fall in pieces and he knows it isn't safe to go on the second floor but he does anyways to find the man he loves. He reaches the second floor and watches his step as he walks down the hallway screaming Eddie's name. The second bedroom down he sees a dog next to Eddie, who is lying on the ground. The dog is just sitting there and he knows that the dog is the reason Eddie didn't evacuate in the first place.

"Cap i found him." Buck radios in.

"Buck, this house is going down. Get out!" 

Buck is coughing as he examines Eddie. Buck grabs Eddie under his arms and begin to drag him down the stairs, if he was awake it would hurt like hell. "Come on, come here." Buck calls the dog as he tries to get out. The dog is well trained and follows him easily. He knows the whole team is worried outside. The dog runs out first and a few seconds after follows Buck dragging Eddie out. Buck throws Eddie on the lawn and half the team begin to hose down the house while the other half come help Eddie.

"Get this mask off of him!" Hen says as Chimney rips it off and Hen replaces it with an oxygen mask. Buck is just kneeling beside him holding his hand while his team works around him. 

"Pulse is coming up" Chimney says a few seconds before Eddie starts coughing from all the smoke inhalation. "Glad you're back buddy." Chim says as Eddie catches his breath.

After everything calms down a bit, Buck and Eddie are sitting on the step of the ambulance waiting for their team to clean up the house. Eddie is still breathing into the oxygen mask while talking to his boyfriend.

"I love you too." Buck states in the middle of Eddie's sentence. 

"Um-" Eddie begins but Buck interrupts again.

"Before you went in there, you said you loved me. I don't if you meant it or you just said it but I love you too."

"I don't remember saying that, but yeah, I love you." Eddie's words make Buck smiles so wide that Eddie has his heart eyes when they look at each  
other.


	7. The Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bomb was never meant to hurt him but it hurt him so much his entire life changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2x18 but includes worried Eddie.

The team was sitting on the fire truck when dispatched announce that Bobby Nash was on the line with an important message. Not long after that they were on the ground. 

EDDIE'S POV

I'm not sure how long I was down but I stand up and our firetruck is tipped over. A lot of the team were still on the ground but began to make their way up to their feet. I see Hen getting out of the ambulance and Chimney standing up and walking over to me. There was so much chaos going on it was hard to know where everyone was. But wherever I looked I couldn't see Buck.

I heard screams, from someone who was in so much pain. I walked around to the other side of the truck only to see my boyfriend pinned under the truck. I run over to help and to just hold his hand. As I kneel down beside him I see that no one else is coming to help. 

"Hey Buck, I'm here. You're gonna be okay." There was blood dripping from his face and I squeezed his hand and began to examine his body. Although, I didn't care enough to examine my surroundings because all I cared about was Buck.

"Eddie! Eddie" Chimney screams from the distance I look behind me and I see him waving me to come over to him. And then when I look to my left, there was a teenage boy with bombs tied around him staring at me.

"Get over there!" He shouts as me and points to the wall. "Now! or I blow you up!"

"Buck, I love you" I say before I let go of his hand and walk away. He's still screaming in pain and tears are dripping from my eyes. I'm being filled with so much anxiety and nervousness because I can't help I can only watch him suffer. 

"Where's the captain!" The boy shouts repeatedly until Chimney walks out.

"I'm the captain" 

"Where's captain Nash!"

"He's no longer the captain here." Chimney explains

"I'm right here" Bobby walks from the crowd of people, right up to the bomber and Chimney steps back.

"You were supposed to be on that truck."

"Yeah well I wasn't. And you almost killed that innocent kid under there," Bobby says referring to Buck. "He's 27 years old, he wasn't even a firefighter when you're dad burnt down that restaurant."

"I didn't want to hurt him, it was supposed to be you." 

"Yeah well you did and for all you know his career is over." Buck is still screaming in the background. "I understand, you lost almost everything."

"You don't understand"

"I do understand, and you are the only thing your mother has left." The boys mother approaches in the distance and distracts the boy long enough for Bobby to disarm him and for the cops to have him in handcuffs. I ran over to Buck followed by Hen and Chim to take a look.

"Alright, I'm not gonna sugarcoat this Buck, looks pretty bad. If we can't get this truck on you we may have to amputate."

"No-No" Buck cries and looks at me. "I need my leg. Eddie, please."

Tears begin dripping from my eyes. "Buck, it's pretty bad. We'll do what we can but I just want to get you out of here."

"Alright, let's try to lift this off of him." Chimney yells to the team. They all rush over and grab the truck. They make very little movement and it isn't enough to get Buck out. Buck is crying and Hen is trying to keep him calm. All of a sudden the crowd watching comes rushing over to help life the fire truck. It moves my heart of how many people want to help him.

"One, two, three!" Chim yells. They lift it high enough for me and Hen to drag him out and get him on a backboard. We load him into the ambulance and no one is surprised when I ride with him.


	8. While Unconsious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the ambulance ride to the moment Buck wakes up in the hospital. Eddie's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I've been updating like crazy but I'm really excited for this chapter. Grabs some tissues greys fans

Eddie's POV

Hen, Chim, and I ride in the ambulance with Buck to the hospital. The ride was long and uneventful. Buck had tears in his eyes as he squeezed my hand. I'm is doing my best to stay calm for him but inside I'm a mess with no way to express the emotion.

"Eddie" Buck whisphers as he cries a little.

"I'm right here and I'm not leaving, I love you." I hold back his tears as much as I can.

"Is it bad?" 

"Yeah," I nods "it's pretty bad, but you'll be okay. I promise" Even on the first day of training we are told to never make promises. But at this moment I knew I needed to make a promise. I knew it was what he had to hear. 

"I don't want to die." He whispers to me.

"You're not gonna die. I won't let that happen."

(Here's where it gets emotional you grey's anatomy fans)

"Eddie... It's bad. Please... tell... Maddie that I love her and that she was a good sister and please-" He begins

"You're not dying, your gonna be fine." I let go of his hand as I look in his eyes.

"Hold my hand."

"No I'm not holding your hand because you aren't dying. Do you hear me your gonna be fine." I watch his as he cries and I can't do anything to help. "I love you."

"You don't have to say it just because-"

"No I do, I love you, I was always in love with you and I will always be in love with you. Which is why you have to be okay. We- We are going to get married and you're gonna be an amazing fire fighter. We're gonna have two or three kids."

"So, so Christopher can have siblings" He says to me with shallow breaths.

"Yeah a sister and two brothers, we're gonna be happy Evan. You and me. We're gonna have the best life. You and me, we're gonna be so happy. So you have to be okay. You can't die because we're supposed to end up together. We're meant to be."

"Meant to be." Meant to be was the last thing he said to me before he started coding. Hen quickly jumps into work to try to make sure he stays alive as we arrive to the hospital and I have to hand him off to doctors. 

\----  
Moments later I'm pacing around a hospital waiting room and I can't stop tears from dripping down my eyes. The rest of the team looks worried but they're sitting down. And then Maddie bursts through the doors with tears falling from her eyes. The team stands up and Chimney goes to hugs her as she falls into his arms. 

I calm down as I see the assistant surgeon walk into the room. We all walk up to her.

"So far, the surgery has been intense and we're doing everything we can. He's stabilized but however his left leg is almost... hanging on by a string. We think it is best to amputate."

"He's a firefighter. He won't want to live without his leg." Maddie explains.

"He may not have a life if we don't amputate. At this point he would have better luck with regaining function with a prosthetic than the his leg now."

"Um okay" Maddie says as she looks at me but I am speechless. "Eddie?"

"Do whatever you need to keep him alive." I say and Maddie nods and the doctor gives her a form to sign. She briefly reads it over and signs it. Buck's whole life just changed.  
\----

He's been in surgery for almost 7 hours. The whole crew stayed. They all called their families to let them know what was going on and Cap has done the honors of calling Carla for Eddie and ask her to watch Christopher longer. Of course Carla cares so much about Buck that she drops Christopher off at his abuelas house so she can be supporting Buck as well.

This time when the doctors come in its 2 of them not just the one. Everyone stands up ready to hear the news of a lifetime.

"He's stable and in the ICU." The head surgeon says, "we amputated above the knee of his left leg. We understand this will be a lot of adjustment for him and his loved ones. But most importantly he made it out and he is expected to make a full recovery." 

"Can I see him?" I ask.

"The nurses are getting him situated now and he will be out for a few hours. It's family only," he pauses and looks around at the team knowing they will all say their family, "um direct family only. Spouse, parents, or siblings." He turns and looks at me. "What is your relationship to him?"

"I'm his boyfriend."

"Sorry direct family only. You can see him when he wakes up." The doctors says and turns to Maddie to take her in. It breaks my heart how I'm not considered family but I know its the law and I have to respect it. I sit in the waiting room patiently until a nurse comes in to tell me he's awake and I can see him.


	9. It all changes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Buck wakes up, he feels this sharp shooting pain up his leg, or what he thinks is his leg.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhh I'm really loving where this is going. If you want to talk to me you can dm me on instagram @thedelucas.

BUCK'S POV

I wake up to the sounds of machines beeping and the feeling of air flowing up my nose. My whole body aches and feels heavy.

"Buck, Buck" Maddie whisphers at me as I look around the room. The room is empty except for the two of us. "Calm down." She says and I realize I'm hyperventilating. Pain is shooting up my leg as I try to grab my thigh and Maddie moves my hands. "Buck, listen to me. The doctors amputated your leg in surgery but you're going to be okay. I promise." She speaks slowly and clearly. I keep rehearing the word amputated as I try to move the blankets to look. Maddie stops me again.

"No-no" I stutter over and over trying to look. Tears fall from my eyes. I nurse walks in and she smiles at me as she puts something into my IV line. I look at her and Maddie confused. 

"Buck, that's gonna help with the pain." Maddie says calmly.

"Let me see it." I say to her.

"Buck I'm not sure that's a good-"

"Maddie!" I shout but not very loud. She nods as she holds one of my hands in her and uses the other one to pull back the blanket. 

When I see it I start to shed tears, a lot more than before. It's wrapped in a white bandage all the way up my thigh. And I can't move I'm just stunned. It's just a stump. It looks like a stump. A pointless stump. I only look for a few seconds before Maddie covers it back with the blanket. 

"Buck, you're gonna be okay."

"Where's Eddie?" I ask and a few seconds later he is standing the doorway. 

"Hey" he says in a soft voice as he walks over to me. "How are you feeling?" He takes a seat on the chair next to my bed.

"They amputated" I say so quietly he can barely hear me. At this point more tears a dripping down my face.

"I know, but you're gonna be okay." 

"I-I can't work anymore."

"Don't think about that right now. Okay? That doesn't matter." He strokes my face before he leans into kiss me. There's a knock at the door and I look up to see a doctor.

"Evan? I'm doctor Lincoln. May I do a quick examination?" He asks and I nod and let him do what he needs to do. When he moves the blanket over to look at the 'stump' I flinch and I turn my head to face Eddie. After a few seconds of his examination he asks, "Are you feeling a lot of pain?" 

"Uh, yeah." 

"Alright that's to be expected but I'll have a nurse give you some more morphine." He moves the blanket back over my leg and begins talking about the surgery. I don't listen that much because I know Maddie and Eddie are. He says stuff like pain, recovery, and adjustment. I started to listen more carefully when I see him hand a couple of pamphlets. "Here are some information about prosthetics and on the front there is the number of one of the best prosthetists in Los Angeles. In a few weeks you can make an appointment to get fitted for prosthetics and after that about 8 to 12 weeks of physical therapy before it'll be comfortable to walk." I doze off again and I think the doctor notices. "Evan? Do you have any questions?"

"Uh, when can I go home?" 

"If everything looks okay then in about a week." I nod to his reply and then he walks out of the room. 

"Buck? Were you listening?" Maddie asks me.

"Yeah," I nod "Sorta." It was hard to listen though. Everything just became a blur. My whole life just changed and they expect me to move on and I can't even think about anything else.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically the highlights of Buck's time in the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 69 days until season 3 comes out !

The first few days ( and nights) were really rough for Buck. He was always tired but whenever he slept he was jolted awake with pain. The pain killers helped with headaches from his concussion and his soreness but they couldn't help with the phantom pain. How were they supposed to help with a body part that isn't even there. 

Although the nights were rough Eddie was almost always there. Occasionally he had to leave to see Christopher but he tried to be with Buck as much as possible. When Eddie wasn't there, Maddie was. The whole team visited him more than once and Carla even brought Christopher by a few times. Everybody cared so much for Buck and did whatever was needed to make it easier on him. Cap even gave Eddie a week off so he could be by Buck's side when he was in the hospital.

It was close to Buck's discharge day. When he was finally getting some sleep the doctor pulled Eddie and Maddie out of the room to ask him some questions about Buck's living situation.

"Does he live with you? Or his sister?" The doctor asks them.

"Um, no he lives alone." Maddie answers.

"Is he living in a one story place?"

"No. It has stairs and no elevator."

"Well we recommend that all new amputees live where it is easily accessible to a bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen. As well as, with someone who can help him move around easier and monitor his pain medication. Basically in my professional opinion he should move in with one of you, which ever has an easy access home." After the doctor says that Eddie and Maddie exchange looks.

"My house is one floor, no porch, no stairs. He can move in with me." Eddie says and the doctor walks away leaving the two of them standing alone.

"Are you sure? You guys have only been going out a few weeks." Maddie says.

"Yeah, he spent almost every night at my place anyways. And besides, it's already made for someone with a walking disability."

\---

When Buck wakes up Eddie is sitting in the chair that he has spent the majority of the week in. 

"Hey" Buck whispers and Eddie looks up from his phone.

"Hey. You feeling better?" He asks and Buck nods. "I need to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"Well, do you want to move in with me? I just think that it would be easier for you at my place rather than your two story apartment. And you know, you spend a lot of time at my place anyways." 

"Yeah," Buck smiles "I want to move in with you." They both smile and Eddie leans in to kiss Buck.

\----  
The last couple days with Buck being in the hospital were uneventful for the most part. It basically consisted of nurses helping Buck learn to use the crutches and how to move around in the wheelchair. 

At this point all Buck wanted to do is leave. And he did. The doctor signed his discharge papers and Eddie took him home. Before he was discharged Eddie already went to Buck's apartment to get everything Buck needed.


	11. Phantom Pains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first night since Buck's been out of the hospital/

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a while and sorry this is short.

If we're being honest Buck was terrified to move in with Eddie after the accident. Buck didn't want to feel like a burden to him. He thought that Eddie would end up taking care of him instead of living his own life. Buck doesn't feel capable of anything right now besides sitting on the couch all day. 

Eddie, on the other hand loves having Buck around. He doesn't mind that he needs to help him with everything and Eddie knows that Buck would do the same for him. Buck is amazing with Christopher and Eddie loves seeing them together. Even though Buck doesn't do much he still makes Christopher happy by being around. 

The first night with Buck at Eddie's was difficult for Buck. He spent most of the day in bed or on the couch but somehow by 8 o'clock he was exhausted. Buck was passed out on the couch when the movie he was watching with Christopher ended. Eddie took Christopher to bed and came back out to get Buck to bed.

Eddie smiles at the sight of his sleeping boyfriend. He bends down so he is eye level with him, "Buck?" Buck groans as a response, "You need to to wake up so you can take one of your meds," Eddie continues.

"I know, I can get them myself." Buck responds when he sees Eddie walking to the bathroom to get them.

"No you can't." Eddie returns with the orange bottle and a glass of water for Buck.

"You don't have to take care of me." Buck says before gulping down the pill.

"Yes I do. Now do you want me to carry you to bed?"

"As much as I'd love that I can get to bed myself." Buck replies and grabs his crutches. He stumbles a little to get up but then he manages to hop over to the bedroom. Buck is very stubborn even though the doctor recommended that he uses a wheel chair Buck just won't. He doesn't want to seem weak.

\----

While they sleep Buck uses Eddie as his pillow. Buck had no trouble falling asleep but he has trouble staying asleep. The bedroom is pitch black and Buck jolts awake. He sits up and causes Eddie to wake up. Buck groans in pain as he grabs his 'stump' and winces a little.

"You okay?" Eddie asks sitting up behind him.

"I'm fine go back to sleep."

"Are you having phantom pains?"

"What?" 

"The doctor said you might experience it."

"Yeah but I'm fine. I just need to go back asleep." Buck says with a tear falling from his eye. Eddie doesn't see it and cuddles right up against Buck as he falls back asleep. More tears fall from Buck's eye as the pain gets too much but he wants to stay strong in front of Eddie.


	12. The "Date" (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck and Eddie have been together for almost a year, however they have never been on a real date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't updated this in a while but hopefully this will make up for it.

Buck has started physical therapy with his prosthetic a few days ago and has been beginning to walk around the house. Buck hasn't really left the house unless it was to go to Maddie's apartment. He was self conscious with the way he looked and the stares he got. Ever since he's gotten his prosthetic his confidence went up. He still couldn't walk but at least something was there instead of an empty gap. 

Buck is still in bed when Eddie comes home from driving Christopher to school. Eddie knocks on the already opened bedroom door. "Morning sleepyhead." Eddie says with a smile as he crawls back in to bed.

"Hey" Buck smirks at him and then kisses him, "Hm, you want to know what I just realized?"

"What?" Eddie says and kisses him again.

"We have never been on a real date." 

"Yes we have."

"No we haven't. So tomorrow night I am going to take you out, on a real date." Buck says to him.

"Where are we going?" 

"I'm not telling you it's a surprise. And you are going to be late for work so get out of here."

"Fine, I love you" Eddie says one more time before kissing him and getting out of bed.

"I love you too." Buck responds and before he knows it Eddie's out the door.

\---

Later that day Buck is sitting on the couch with Maddie and he's telling her all about the date he has planned for Eddie.

"So I made a reservation at that fancy Italian place in Santa Monica. Then we're gonna go down to the pier where I'm going to propose." Buck says and Maddie spits out her drink.

"Propose? Don't you think it may be a little soon, "Maddie says.

"Well we're already living together and plus I want to do it before he does."

"You think he's gonna say yes?" 

"Why wouldn't he say yes? Do you think it's a bad idea? Should I not propose? Oh my god... he wants to break up with me?" Buck says anxiously as the ways Eddie could reject him run through his mind.

"Evan, stop spiraling. If you want to propose then you should propose."

"Well I have to because I already bought the ring."

\---

Eddie is at the fire house with the rest of the team. They just got off a call he thinks Buck would've loved to be apart of. Ever since Buck's injury Eddie tried his best not to talk about calls so it doesn't make Buck miss it more. 

Eddie and Chimney are sitting at the table near the firehouse kitchen. "Buck is taking me on a date tomorrow night and i think I'm gonna propose to him." Eddie says.

"Woah. Big step don't you think." Chimney responds

"Well yeah it's the biggest step. And I know he's gonna say yes."

"Why is that?"

"Because he is head over heels in love with me."

"How are you gonna do it?"

"I have no idea. I decided to do it this morning I don't even have a ring. Do I need a ring? Do guys even do that?"

"Maybe you should think it through."

"I did. I'm definitely gonna do it. He didn't tell me what we're doing but I'm assuming it's dinner and something. I'm going to propose during the dinner I guess."

"You don't think Buck's taking you on this date so HE can propose." Hen says after eavesdropping the whole coversation.

"No. He definitely wants me to propose."

\---

After Chimney shift he picks up Chinese food and takes it to Maddie's like he does every Thursday night. When he's there he has some interesting information to tell her.  
"Guess what?!" Maddie shouts at Chimney when she opens the door.

"Wait I have to tell you something too."

"Same time?" Maddie suggests and Chim nods

"Bucks gonna propose to Eddie"

"Eddie is going to propose to Buck"

They say simultaneously. 

"Oh Eddie is planning on proposing too?" Maddie asks and Chim nods in response. "We don't tell them right?"

"Definitely not."


End file.
